Let me start by wishing you all the best in the New Year. Now that the parties are over and you’ve spent perhaps your first holidays as an engaged couple, it’s time to start planning for the biggest party of your life….your wedding day.

So, what can you expect as you plan your new life together?

In a word….everything. Overnight you’ve gone from courtship to project manager. The times you used to spend enjoying a quiet evening together are now filled with contacting wedding professionals, checking out websites, asking friends for advice and answering a host of inquiries from friends, family and future in-laws wanting to know just what you plans are (might you feel just a little stressed?).

Then, there’s all the money you’ll be spending. An average wedding in Western New York costs over $25,000 dollars. That’s more than many individuals take home (after taxes) in a year. Perhaps one or more parents will be paying for part of the wedding. If someone besides the bride and groom is paying, you know they’ll want some say in how the money is spent (more stress).

Good thing your fiancé is there to help out, right? Well, maybe yes and maybe no. Most guys aren’t that interested in the details of the wedding. Just tell him where the ceremony is and when to show up. Guys learned a long time ago that when it comes to the wedding day itself, we’re just another accessory (guys know it’s really all about the dress). He finally popped the question, so please…cut him some slack.

But seriously, planning a wedding is stressful. And it’s not just the big day, it’s your lives coming together in a new way, his family and your family. How will you spend future holidays together? Where are you going to live? What about kids and careers? The money question, who earns it and who spends it, invests it? And what’s that strange thing he does with his food?

Okay, Chris, so what are the answers?

I wish there was a quick answer to all these questions, but there isn’t. What I will do, though, is spend the next few columns providing some real world possibilities for you to consider. Everyone’s personality and approach is unique. What works for one person may not work for someone else. That said, there are many similar situations, like the ones I’ve mentioned above, that we all must address.